Money Making By Creating Boundaries
Today’s topic is extra juicy. It’s literally about how to make more money while working less. Yes, actually.
I’m not kidding.
We’re gonna make more money right here, right now, by setting better boundaries in relationships with clients. And I know what you’re thinking… You’re thinking setting boundaries means you’re gonna lose money.
I need to give give give. I need to OVER deliver in order to be good enough. I’m not gonna make any money if I don’t work weekends and make myself available for people.
Know what this actually feels like?
It feels like being needy as fuck. And your clients are gonna feel that shit… and they’re gonna be even needier. ‘Cus they’ll know you thrive on their approval and they’re gonna smell it like a shark smells blood.
So repeat after me right the fuck now:
“Jamie, I am done needing everyone’s approval. I’m gonna have people pissed off at me and I don’t give a fuck ‘cus that’s not who I’m here for. I’m gonna show up in the way that feels good for me so I can find my people. That’s how I’m gonna get my clients the best fucking results ever.
I don’t need to be, do, or have anything else to earn anybody’s respect.”
You know you’ve got needy clients. And that’s ok, boo. We’re gonna #BlessThem and release them to make room for people who appreciate the fuck outta you. Who value your work. Who you don’t have to perform for…
And this is the crash course on how to attract those people. Starting right now.
I know you’re afraid somebody isn’t gonna hire you again, might leave you a bad review, what the fuck ever…
But holding onto that person is taking away from the space you have to hold for the people who truly need you, who will be inspired by your boundaries, and who will rise up to meet you.
So let’s become a money making boundary badass right now. Here’s how.
RULE ONE: IDENTIFY WHO YOU’RE NOT FOR
Who do you NOT want to work with?? So often we get stuck thinking about our ‘Ideal Client Avatar’ that we forget to think about what we absolutely do not want.
So right now, yes now, grab a pen and paper and list out all the things you are absolutely not available for.
Here’s your journal prompt: No amount of money is worth working for people who are…
Because let’s face it. Your integrity and your value are not pegged to any one person or outcome. So stop acting like what one person thinks of you is gonna make any difference.
RULE TWO: CLEAR COMMUNICATION OF EXPECTATIONS
Not only do you need to actually set boundaries, but you gotta clearly communicate them to your people.
Are you gonna take weekends off from Voxer? Tell them.
Are you gonna not reply to emails on Mondays and Fridays? Tell them.
Clearly communicate how you’re gonna show up. Own it in your contract, terms and conditions, and verbal communication. Everywhere, every way.
FIRST.... Explain why. “I don’t answer Voxer on the weekends because I’m spending time with my family and need to be completely present.”
Remember: If someone has a problem with this, it says more about their own victim story than it does to do with you.
SECOND… Tell them: “Here is what I expect from you…”
You’re meeting them halfway. You are not responsible for their results, and they need to know what the fuck is expected of them in order to receive transformation.
Plus, you’re leading by example here boo. If you tell them why you’re doing this and then you’re telling them how they need to show up… there’s no grey area. This is what it means to set boundaries… It’s all about clearly letting people know how you’re gonna show up and what you expect in return.
RULE THREE: HONOR THE LAW OF ATTRACTION
Are you expecting things of your coach or employees and not communicating to them what you need or want?
When it comes to boundaries in relationships you gotta remember people are not fucking mind readers. If you expect gifts every Mother’s Day, you tell your spouse. If you need your emails to go out before one in the afternoon, you tell your team.
“They should’ve known” is not a thing. Poor communication IS a thing. So.
Ask yourself:
Where am I being needy as fuck in my life?
Where am I not taking responsibility for my relationships, life, and business?
You’re allowed to make mistakes. We fuck up all the time. But listen boo, it’s your secret weapon for your life and business to own that shit and shift.
RULE FOUR: AFFIRM WHY YOU ARE ENOUGH AS YOU ARE
I want you to set affirmations and use them all the fucking time about why you’re enough and what you’re available for.
You have to own the fact that some people are gonna be mad no matter what you do. Focus on showing up to provide and deliver what you’re the most capable and provide the most value by setting firm AF energetic minimums and maximums.
And that’s gonna mean making clear boundaries in relationships and business.
Every single successful person I know has haters. In fact, the more successful, the more haters and the firmer boundaries.
But you get to choose whether you help them and self sacrifice to do so OR… if you show the fuck up for the people who need you by not self sacrificing.
Journal this shit out:
Why am I good enough as I am right now?
Where am I trying to ‘earn’ love and how can I shift that shit?
Then create new affirmations about how you’re gonna show up. These are gonna look like:
They’re still gonna love me, even if I respond in an hour after I put my kids to bed.
I’m still providing value if I take this time to be present with my friends.
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU HAVE AN OFF THE RAILS BOUNDARY PUSHING CLIENT
If you have a client who is out of control…
AKA they’re messaging you all the fucking time on #allthethings wondering if you ‘got their message’...
DO NOT RESPOND RIGHT AWAY.
50/50 chance they’re gonna leave or they’re gonna straighten up their act. The people you lose are gonna be stuck in victim mode and not truly ready to grow. The ones who stay will be inspired AF by your boundary badassieness.
I recently had a girl in my mastermind who called a client from her personal phone. All of a sudden, this chick was messaging her personal number, phoning her, emailing her… trying to contact her in every way possible to see if she was gonna respond ‘sometime soon’.
This behavior is totally unacceptable and ‘accepting’ it by responding right away makes it something the person thinks it’s ok to repeat again and again.
So, when you have a client who is totally off the rails and not respecting boundaries, here’s what I want you to do.
Come at them with the Oreo Cookie Method (aka a lot of love, feedback and constructive criticism, sandwiched with more love) and say:
“I love how dedicated you are to this growth and how excited you are to show up. But this current situation is not working for me. In order to provide you with the best experience and nurture you in a productive way, I need you to [insert boundary here, such as ‘message me in Voxer] and I will respond to you in X hours. If this doesn’t work for you, I totally understand and we can renegotiate the terms of our agreement.”
Ya, this shit isn’t gonna be easy. And there’s a chance people will not be willing to renegotiate and you’re gonna have to let them the fuck go.
MOVING FORWARD: PEOPLE’S SHIT IS NOT YOUR SHIT
Always come from a place of love when setting boundaries. Especially love for yourself. And guess what?
The people who are stuck in victim mode will stay stuck and move away from you…
And the people who are ready to rise will stick around and rise the fuck up with you leading the way as a boundary badass.
You can ask any of my private clients, mastermind clients, anybody who is working with me. They love the boundaries I’ve set in our relationships. It shows them what’s possible and that they don’t need to burn the fuck out in order to have success for themselves, too.
I am showing them it’s true that “Even if my clients don’t love me and decide to leave me, I’m gonna be ok. There are better ways to make money than sacrificing myself.”
Remember, you’re here to provide a specific service and stay in integrity while doing so, this is how you’ll lead your people.
So tell me below, how will you show the fuck up for your boundaries today?
